so a lot has happened since i last wrote a blog. maybe. i really dont want i guess. but today has been one roller-coaster and i dont know why. hm..it seems like lately i have been in a bipolar mood lately. why? let me know if you figure it out because i would REALLY like to know what is wrong with me lately. i guess it started sunday and it has just been happening since. yes i know it is only tuesday but it still counts. maybe its because of this kid i thought was my friend but then i guess he isnt. i mean seriously who the fuck gets mad because i wanted to do something nice for a friend and then tells his mother that i am causing all the drama. it is stupid because he likes to turn things around to be about him. i'm sorry but i was trying not to bottle things up and let people run my life. so i sent him a message [this is before break happened] and i told him what i thought and i told him why i was mad/frustrated and he lied to me FIVE TIMES. and i know that they were lies because ugh. its hard to explain unless you read the stupid message. which lead to me losing my best friend. great. not. i miss him. and i miss talking to him. but he wont answer me no matter what i do. who knows i suppose. i guess i am just going to live with what happened. whatever. my lost. so i lose. they win. go figure. but i do miss him a lot because he was my world in a way. okay, not really my world but he was a big part of my world and he means a lot to me. i care about him and everything but that doesn't mean anything to him apparently. whatever.
anywho, what else was i going to talk about in this blog. i had a ton of stuff i wanted to say. ugh. so the lcm retreat is coming up this weekend. i'm going. bringing my camera for photography and my digital camera. cause i seem to be lacking pictures of college. meh. oh well. but yeah. i'm bringing my 35mm camera along with me. why? because i have film i want to use and get rid of . well i am using film that we are using in class this semester but still. i dont know i want to go but at the same time i am afraid to go. i guess i am not because i just talked to my friend about what i believe in, but at the same time not a lot of people do know. and the fact that i am not comfortable talking about religion might bug people which is fine. and i dont care if people want to talk about it, but seriously it shouldn't matter if they want to answer a damn question or not. hell i have wanted to tell people to shut the erf up. meh.
so i bought this cd. its a celtic music for stress relief. ya..not sure if that is working right now. maybe its me but who knows. i dont think it is working. i like the music however. and i use to have a cd that made thunderstorm noises and i fell asleep to that. i love thunderstorms. which makes me laugh at minnesota weather. today it was sleeting with thunder and lightning. pretty kick ass if you ask me.
so i just watched the social network for the first time. haha. funny. i was wondering, what would happen if facebook died for a day. my theory is that no one would know what to do. i mean how many people are on facebook and live by facebook? i know i am on facebook a lot and i have it on my phone but meh. i've given it up for a month and i got a lot of stuff done. even though it was over winter break but still. i didnt have to creep on people just to see what they were doing. i was able to just talk to them. i think it would be a funny thing to see what would happen if no one was able to get on facebook for 24 hours.
well...my mind is wondering to much to type. later blog!
I have found that it is not unusual for people to be afraid to talk about what they believe in. So you don't need to feel odd that it's hard for you, because it's hard for a lot of people.
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