so i think this might be the most i've written in a week? ha probably not. but anywho, i have been looking around online at the study abroad site that is linked up to the school's website. and its been my dream to travel europe, i dont know why really but i would love to go to greece, italy, london, ireland and of course australia for a while. its funny cause everyone wants to go to paris, meh. i say meh to france. i've heard its beautiful but meh, i am more interested in things i can take pictures of that aren't the same over and over again. i mean how many pictures are there of the Eiffel tower floating about the internet/world, a ton. but no, i've been looking since i am getting slightly annoyed with people at home/school. and my solution is to leave the country. i know, i know it sounds stupid but what? go spend a year in italy and then come back and finish off school? well i would be attending school over there but still. i want to go to florence, italy. one because it is beautiful there, and two it has my major in a lot of different ways. not just normal boring photography. no it has film photography, food photography and a lot more. makes me excited just thinking about it. so i have to go and see what i can do in order to get onto the study aboard thing. however, i'm not going to leave next year. since...yeah. maybe my "senior" year. since i know i wont be graduating in four years from college. blah. that just makes me sad thinking i will most likely be here past four years. yay art major!
so my week hasn't been from hell yet thus far. which is good. i have a quiz today though, just i am not looking forward to since well i dont know. i suck at this and it is weird cause normally i dont suck at math. yep. i am normally smart at math but for some stupid reason i dont understand this math...probably because it is mostly math theory! ugh.
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so i just finished my classes and i just got back from developing negatives for a project. FUCK THAT! ugh. i told myself i wouldn't fuck up and yet i did. of course i fucked up. what else am i good at huh? i can't seem to do alternative ways of developing negatives so what the fuck?! ugh. i swear the world is out to fucking get me or i am just about to die. i'm trying to breathe and i am trying to figure it out and yet i can't seem to do anything about it right now. so i'm taking a mental sick day tomorrow. i mean seriously lately nothing is going correctly. i dont know why i even care right now. i mean ugh! i might not do photography in the fall. i might just wait a year and then start it back up. yes i know that would mean putting me slightly behind but who cares. i mean why do i care that fluffy's girlfriend is going to be here huh? i mean its his life and i shouldn't be mad about it. well i'm not super pissed off. just slightly pissed off that he is going to be in a hotel with her all weekend. yeah wtf?! i .... not so fluffy so why should i care? because i haven't heard what he still feels about me? i mean i finally feel better that he isn't ignoring me because i did something wrong. i got that out of him but he is trying to find the words to how he is feeling and it isn't coming. so idk if that is a good thing or a bad thing.
ugh i'm dont ranting right now....
later blog!
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